Happy bloody Easter

Sorry if I'm a little bit distracted today. I've got this problem with a dress for my wedding. Not the wedding dress - that's all fine - but the dress I'm wearing to the wedding afterparty. It is THIS short, hot pink Herve Leger dress that I bought at vast expense from Net a Porter.



It arrived this morning and I fell about it like a starving man on a plate of bacon and eggs.

I tried it on.

It fit - it clung.

My stupid horrible arse arse buggery diet had worked and I looked exactly like a neurotic bride 3 weeks off her wedding.

Fuck... THREE WEEKS? ... Is that it?

Anyway, I rushed upstairs to show Giles who went "Oh my god wow." And then he said. "What are those stains?"

"What stains?" I looked down and saw. With the material pulled taught (taught, not tight) you could see murky sort of water marks all the way down the right hand side. I took the dress off, feeling ill, and hung it up. I rang Net a Porter. They said they'd change it for an unmarked one. But now it's hanging up looking very bright pink and a bit slutty and now I don't know. I'm not really kidding myself too much about a re-wear. I reasoned that I'm never going to be as thin as I'll be on my wedding day and would never have the guts to wear that kind of dress normally, so I might as well just go for it.

But then a little voice in my head - the one that feels ill at the price tags in Anthropologie and scuttles off to Topshop instead - tells me that to buy a dress you might never wear again is profligate and morally bad. But everything I own is a sensible colour and a sensible shape.

Anyway, the indescision rages on.

Meanwhile, here is a picture of a hot cross bun:

made by the lovely Harriet Addison, who follows this blog although she really ought to be writing one of her own (maybe she does?) because she's obviously a much better cook than me. Anyway, get your hot cross buns in for this weekend! I'm off to Waitrose in one hour and don't think for one second that there won't be a cellophane-wrapped package of high-class hot cross buns in my trolley. As I bow to Hadge's higher achievement, I reach for the trans-fats.

In other news, I must report a really textbook bit of storecupboard cooking from Giles yesterday: flageolet and chorizo stew.

You need:

Some chorizo, chopped

Tinned flageolet beans

1 onion

1 Chop up the onion and sweat in a pan with the chorizo for 8-10mins

2 Add the beans (with water)

3 Cook everything, stirring occasionally, for about 12 mins

INSTANT stew. Enjoy with a couple of Haimisha cucumbers.

Have a smashing Easter and try not to think about the fact that it's the celebration of the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus Christ, because it's not a nice story and will make your choccy egg taste funny.